


If You Leave Me Now

by Storygal



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-17
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-07-13 11:29:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16016981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storygal/pseuds/Storygal
Summary: Alex is thrown into a race against time when Kara contracts a mysterious illness.





	1. A Rude Awakening

**Author's Note:**

> I started this story a year ago. It’s nowhere near finished, but I’ve decided to throw caution to the wind and post what I have, even if it sucks. Otherwise, it’ll never see the light of day. 
> 
> This is going to be a very interesting experiment because although I have a general idea of where I want this fic to go, I have no idea how I’m going to get there. I’d be honored if you choose to come along for the ride. :-)

“My beautiful Kara,” Alex breathed in Kryptonese, the soft words fading into a cascade of kisses against her sister’s inviting lips.  “I love you.  So much.” 

Alex wrapped her arm around Kara's bare back, drawing her sister into her bosom.  For a brief moment she wondered how she was able to lift her super sister with such ease, but her musings fled as Kara’s breasts pressed into her own.  Nuzzling her nose in Kara's golden tresses, she closed her eyes as the scents of vanilla, lavender and something distinctly Kara filled her senses.  Kara wrapped her legs around Alex's hips as she burrowed her face in her shoulder, the side of her head resting against Alex's cheek.  

Keeping a firm hold on Kara, Alex carried her to her bedroom, pressing soft kisses to her sister’s cheek as she gently lowered her onto the bed and herself onto Kara’s lithe form.  They melted into the intimate embrace, happily letting their limbs tangle together between the sheets.  They took their time exploring each other’s bodies, sinking into the mounting arousal between them.  Alex wrapped her other arm around Kara, amazed at how well their bodies fit together.  She literally couldn't tell where she ended and Kara began.

Kara placed her hands on Alex’s cheeks as she pulled her sister’s lips to hers for a deep kiss.

“Mmm...my favorite person...” Kara mumbled, her tongue lapping at her sister’s mouth.

Alex let her jaw slacken in response to Kara’s unspoken request, allowing her lover’s tongue to slide over hers in a playful duel.  How on Earth did she get so lucky?  She rarely prayed, but this time she sent silent thanks to whoever might be listening for sending Kara to her.  She knew she didn’t deserve such a precious gift, but she vowed then and there she’d do whatever it took to keep this amazing woman in her arms and in her life. 

As if Kara had heard her thoughts, she locked her cerulean eyes with Alex's hazel ones with a look that was at once piercing and pleading. 

“Don’t let me go,” she whispered, an almost desperate timbre to her words. 

Squeezing Kara, Alex brought her sister's head against her cheek.  "I gotcha," she murmured with reverence, pulling Kara in even closer.  "I gotcha…"

Alex’s eyes snapped open at the sound of her mobile phone’s shrill ringtone as her fingertips collided with something that felt like sandpaper compared to the smooth contours of her alien girl’s skin.  With a start she realized she was cradling a large pillow in her arms where Kara had been a scant moment before.  Her left arm shot out to her side, her hand stretching across the mattress in search of her sister, then dropping with a silent thud as her hand met empty air.

A dream.  Nothing but a fucking dream.  

The mobile phone’s insistent ringing blasted through Alex’s thoughts.  Letting go of the pillow as if it were a burning coal, she lunged forward and grabbed her phone off the night table none too gently.  She froze at the sound of Maggie’s brassy voice on the other end of the line.

“I know I’m probably the last person you wanna hear from,” Maggie said in a rough tone, “but you need to get down to the bar now.  “This is a case for your peeps."

Alex swallowed hard.  She hadn’t heard a word from her ex-fiancée over the past few months.  Not even after Kara almost died battling Reign.  Not to mention her own confrontations with Reign.  Or while she was recovering from her near-fatal encounter with Pestilence.

“Alex...are you there?”

“I’m...I’m here, Mags.  What’s going on?”

"I've got a dead alien that looks like he's been fried—twice.  Get down here as soon as you can."  Alex's reply was cut short by a resounding click on the other end of the line. 

Alex stood in place as her eyes drifted over to her bed, her mind still expecting to see Kara looking up at her.  Once again the only sight greeting her was an empty bed with crumpled sheets.  A lone tear trickled down her cheek, which she roughly wiped away.  No time for that now.

She sped around her bedroom like a swarm of hornets in search of some not-yet-funky clothes to put on.  Grabbing her phone again, she punched in her speed dial code for Vasquez.

Vasquez picked up before the end of the first ring.  “Director?  What’s wrong?  Is Supergirl okay?”

“I don’t have time to explain, Vas.”  Alex sighed heavily as she pulled on a pair of faded jeans.  “Meet me at the dive bar.  Detective Sawyer’s got a dead alien she wants us to look at...bring one of the special body bags.  I don’t know what we’re walking into.”

“We’re on our way, Director.”  Vasquez abruptly ended the call the same way Maggie had moments earlier.

                                                                                  ****

Twenty minutes later Alex sprinted out of her apartment to her motorcycle parked in the building’s garage, her mind still reeling from Maggie’s call and that crazy dream about Kara.  Even now she could feel the soft friction of Kara’s body against her skin.

But of course it had to be a dream.  Kara had been off world for almost a couple of weeks now.  She’d gotten a visit from her friend from that other Earth—Barry—because of some new crisis needing “super” help.  Alex would have gone with her, but she had her hands full with her new duties as DEO Director.  She’d also gotten the distinct feeling that Kara didn’t want her along.  Barry must have sensed Alex’s uneasiness because he’d whispered in her ear, “Don’t worry.  I’ll bring Kara back safe and sound,” before he and Cisco disappeared with Kara into the inter-dimensional portal.

The motorcycle roared to life, which under different circumstances would have thrilled Alex.  She’d always loved how the vibrations of her bike filled her entire body as she zipped through the city.  The wind rushing past her, the sense of absolute freedom.  She often wondered if Kara felt like this when she was flying.

Kara again.  No matter how hard she tried, she could never get her mind off her Kryptonian for long.

Ahh...her Kryptonian.  Her alien girl.  When did she start thinking of Kara as hers?

As much as she hated to admit it to herself, she was grateful for the dead alien.  He—or she—gave her something solid to focus on.  Something other than the fact that she had just been dreaming about sex with Kara.  Kara.  Her little sister.  Her little sister!  

_I must really miss Kara,_ she thought as she straddled her motorcycle.  Yes, that had to be it.  The mind does very weird things sometimes.  Her training as an agent and her field experience had hammered that lesson into her more times than she cared to count.

                                                                                  ****

The sight of flashing lights and police officers running around took Alex out of her reverie.  Alex parked her motorcycle a few feet away from the bar’s entrance, jumping off almost before coming to a complete stop.  Spotting Maggie in the distance, she was about to jog over to her when she was hit full force with a horrible stench reminding her of decomp, but far stronger than anything she’d ever encountered in the past.  

Her stomach clenched violently in protest, but she managed to keep herself from retching.  She leaned forward against the bar door until the worst of the reaction passed.  Maggie saw Alex’s distress and sprinted over to her immediately.

“You all right?”  Maggie’s eyes were full of concern as she crouched down to look at Alex.

Alex nodded weakly, pulling away from the door.  “I’ll live.  I take it that alien corpse is nearby.”  She’d certainly done more than a little fantasizing about reuniting with Maggie.  But she never would have guessed in her wildest dreams a dead alien would bring them back together.

Be careful what you wish for, her mind warned.

A look of sympathy flashed across Maggie’s face.  “It was a year before I could deal with human decomp without gagging.  Alien decomp...that took a bit longer.   We’re waiting for the ozone generators to kick in.  You up to checking out the body?” 

Alex straightened up, her watery eyes narrowed in determination.  “Let’s go.”

Maggie nodded, pointing to a still form a short distance from her covered with a soiled sheet.  Alex’s eyes were immediately drawn to a large pink stain right in the center.

“Could be blood, but no way to know for sure,” Maggie said in response to the unasked question.  “I figured you’d want to get samples for your lab.”

Alex and Maggie turned around in unison at the sound of tires grinding against the pavement behind them.  Vasquez and two other agents exited the large black SUV and quickly caught up to Alex, recoiling at the stench still reeking from the remains.

Alex had already turned away and was leaning over the alien’s body, breathing steadily from her mouth.  Maggie wasn’t kidding.  This poor creature did look like it had been deep fried.  The DEO’s forensic team definitely needed to see this.

Vasquez was now standing behind her, letting out a low whistle.  “I’ve seen some pretty kooky stuff, but nothing like this!”

Alex finished pulling on a pair of her thick blue gloves and began swabbing some of the weird pink liquid from what she guessed was the alien’s skin.  “Any idea what species?” she asked, looking up at Maggie.

Maggie shook her head.  “Not a clue.  I hope your people have better luck.  I know one thing—I don’t like this.  I can’t put my finger on it, but this just doesn’t smell right—sorry—bad choice of words.”

Alex glared at Maggie pointedly, then held out her hand toward Vasquez, her fingers wrapped tightly around a small vial with some of the fluid from the alien.  

“Take this back to headquarters,” Alex ordered, ignoring Vasquez’s repulsed look.  “Maybe I can figure out what the hell we’ve got here once I get this sample under my microscope.”

Maggie gestured at the alien.  “I’ve told everyone the Feds are taking over this case, but you’ll want to get the body outta here as fast as you can.”

Vasquez nodded, motioning the agents with her to come forward.  Wordlessly they helped her stuff the remains into a special body bag.  Vasquez sighed.  At least the body wouldn’t stink up the entire DEO.

Alex flashed a look of silent thanks at Maggie as she followed Vasquez and the other agents to the SUV.  She was now glad Kara had gone off world.  Now she didn't have to worry about her.  Hopefully she and her team could deal with this mess before her alien sister got back.


	2. Precious Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for taking so long to update this fic. I accidentally deleted most of my previous drafts, and I’ve also struggled with deciding where I wanted to go with this story. I’ve now got a better sense of where the story needs to go, although I’ll still be diving in head first, lol. 
> 
> Thanks again to everyone who gave me kudos or comments. I’ll do my best to post the next chapter much sooner.

Brainy leaned away from the computer monitor he’d been watching and stretched, from boredom rather than fatigue, since of course he didn’t tire nearly as easily as humans.He’d agreed to man the ops center when Vasquez got the call from Alex about going to the— _what did Vasquez call it?_ —the alien bar.Truth be told, he secretly hoped the team had rounded up a rogue alien.The DEO had been maddeningly quiet since Supergirl defeated Reign and her evil cohorts. 

He ran a hand through his dark locks—he was still getting used to his human look.Although judging from the approving stares he’d been getting lately during his jaunts through National City from many women—and more than a few men—he’d nailed it, as Winn would say.

In that moment he also realized he had a lot to learn about this strange new world he was now a part of.There was so much more to the 21st century than what he’d gleaned from the Legion’s archives or heard from Mon-El.

And if he was really honest with himself, he was glad Mon-El had gone back to the future.Maybe now he’d have a chance with Kara, especially since the Kryptonian no longer seemed to be conflicted.Maybe now she was what Winn would call “fair game”.Brainy put his hands behind his head, unaware of the slight smile forming on his lips.The theater a few blocks away would be replaying The Last Jedi for the next few weeks.Hopefully Kara would get back in time for them to see it together...

“Agent Dox!”

Brainy barely managed to stay upright in his chair.Alex was coming toward him at almost superhuman speed, a deep scowl on her face.Even in a leather jacket, t-shirt and faded jeans, Alex was an intimidating presence.And Alex on the warpath was never a good thing.He pitied anyone foolish enough to get in her way.

Behind her was Agent Vasquez and the two junior agents who’d joined her for the trip to the bar.A large black bag on a gurney lay between the junior agents.All four of the humans wore the same grim expression. 

The scene playing out before him reminded him of how he’d seen people act at a funeral.Brainy slowly lifted himself out of the chair, standing up to steel himself for whatever was coming next.His 12th level intellect would be no use to him in this situation.

“We’ve got a decomposing alien in this bag I want you to look at,” Alex said to Brainy in a clipped tone, fixing him with a glowering stare.“You’ve finally got a chance to make yourself useful.Don’t blow it.”

“Yes—yes of course, Director Danvers,” Brainy stammered.“I am at your disposal.”

Alex nodded quickly and brushed past him.“I’m going to get changed,” she said briskly, not looking at him.I’ll call you when I’m ready for you.”

Brainy looked after her, dumbfounded.Just what did she expect him to do?He turned to Vasquez as she and the other agents moved past him toward the morgue below the ops center.Vasquez just shrugged as she met his eyes.

****

Alex grimaced as she stepped out of the shower, quickly wrapping her dripping wet body in a towel to block out the locker room’s chilly air.She could scarcely believe what was happening.Maybe she was still dreaming.

The image of Maggie’s pained expression in her motorcycle’s side view mirror as she sped away from the scenes of death outside the bar flashed unbidden in her mind’s eye.A twinge of sadness gripped her before she could squash it.

She’d felt really guilty about leaving Maggie behind without even saying goodbye.The truth was, she was afraid of what she’d do if she stayed.She was so afraid she’d start bawling or in some other way make a complete fool of herself.

 _You’ve still got it bad, Danvers,_ her mind chastised.  _Real bad._

She still wondered why Maggie had called her after all this time.After all, she didn’t really know for sure that the DEO should get involved.For all Maggie knew, it could have been a run of the mill murder—alien style, of course.

Alex slowly reached for her “armor”, as she now thought of her suit. She smiled as she began the familiar ritual of donning her suit, her mind flashing back to the unabashed excitement coursing through her body the moment Winn had held it out to her. 

Winn.Alex’s smile faded just as quickly as it had appeared when she thought of the quirky geek who had become the DEO’s resident genius and the little brother she’d grown to love.If only the present had offered him more than the future...

She absentmindedly glanced down at her phone on the bench next to her, only to jump back a moment later at the sight of the photo fading into view.It was a selfie she’d taken of her and Maggie at her family’s summer cabin, shortly before Kara’s run-in with Psi. Her free hand was entwined with Maggie’s as they stood side by side against the front door, beaming into the early morning sky.It was her favorite photo of the two of them.

The months prior to that moment had been in such stark contrast, Kara’s depression and distancing having taken a far bigger toll on her than she’d ever admit to herself.Besides, she was past all that now.She could ignore the ache that throbbed in her heart whenever she remembered that dark time.Mostly. 

She didn’t doubt Maggie had been all too aware of her inner turmoil the time.It was Maggie, in fact, who suggested they leave National City behind for a while—no crooks, no aliens, no responsibilities.Just lots of R and R and just the two of them. 

After a week of many animated debates back and forth, Maggie agreed to let Alex take her to the Danvers cabin for their getaway.That cabin held bittersweet memories for Alex—now more bitter than sweet—because of the times with her father.But she was determined to share with Maggie this important part of her history.Not to mention a still vital part of herself.And maybe there she could make a fresh start.Make new memories...

 _Alex_   _wrapped her bare arms around Maggie’s torso, spooning around her fiancée’s body as they snuggled in bed together.  The sun’s light weaved its way through the cabin’s master bedroom window, illuminating the specks of dust hovering just beyond the panes._

_“Mmm...you feel so good,” Maggie purred as Alex’s lips brushed the crevice behind her ear.  “Don’t stop.”_

_Alex smiled into Maggie’s hair.  “Your wish is my command.”_

_Maggie smirked.  “I like the sound of that.  So glad you insisted we come up here.”_

_Alex’s hand reached over to cover Maggie’s.  “You and me both.”_

_Maggie twisted around in Alex’s arms to look into her fiancée’s eyes.  “Maybe this place can be our own little sanctuary.  When the world out there gets to be too much.”_

_Alex nodded in agreement, squeezing Maggie’s hand.  “I really like the sound of that!”_

_Maggie smiled, then her expression turned serious.  “So Danvers...we’re really gonna do this marriage thing?”_

_Alex reached up to tuck a lock of Maggie’s hair behind her ear.  “Yeah.  You’re stuck with me, Mags!”_

****

Fresh tears blurred Alex’s vision as the memory faded.How could everything have gone so wrong so fast?She and Maggie were truly in love.They had so much in common.The same stubbornness, the same fierce determination, the same outlook on life.

They were like the proverbial two peas in a pod except for one thing:she wanted children and Maggie didn’t—ever.

Even now Alex was questioning her decision to end their relationship over this one sticking point.Why couldn’t she compromise on this one thing?

Ruby was the only child she’d actually interacted with for a prolonged period of time.She didn’t even babysit when she was a teenager.But somehow Ruby had awakened within her a desperate need that wouldn’t abate. 

Alex felt her chest tighten as her mind flashed back to the image of Ruby and Sam curled up together in the med bay.She’d felt so invisible in that moment.It was as though all the time she’d spent with the spunky teenager instantly vanished.It was as though she no longer existed—at least not for Ruby.

_Just like when Kara left for Argo City with Mon-El._

Alex swiped her thumb across her phone’s screen to exit her photo gallery, refusing to dwell on that dangerous thought.Opening her contacts list, she flicked through the names.Maggie was still there as a favorite.Should she call Maggie and let her know how much she appreciated the heads up? 

As much as she dreaded the possibility, the alien probably did die under suspicious circumstances.Like Maggie had said, something about that whole scenario just didn’t add up.If Maggie hadn’t called, who knows when anyone else would have alerted the DEO, if at all. 

That was one of the things that had first attracted her to Maggie—the detective’s instincts.They were usually spot on.As for why Maggie hadn’t been in touch with her all these months, she really couldn’t blame Maggie given the way things had ended between them. 

 _She_ was the one who’d insisted on breaking up, not Maggie.If the situation were reversed, she knew she wouldn’t be keen on keeping in touch.She’d have figured it would be best to stay away. 

Maggie didn’t have to call.She could have simply asked one of her fellow detectives to contact the DEO.But Maggie knew her better than just about anyone.Maggie would know she’d want to investigate the situation, especially if Kara could be in danger.It must have taken tremendous courage for Maggie to reach out to her.Alex wasn’t sure she’d have been able to muster that same courage.

_Well, the least I can do is thank Maggie._

Alex was about to tap on Maggie’s number when she heard a soft knock on the door.

“Director,” Vasquez said on the other side of the closed door, “The forensic team’s started the autopsy.”

Alex sighed softly.The call to Maggie would have to wait.It seemed she was always putting her life on hold for one thing or another.

“Thanks Vas.I’ll join them in 10.”The light shuffling noises outside the locker room’s entrance indicated Vasquez was already making her way back to the ops center.

“Brainy,” Alex spoke into the air after making sure her comm was firmly in place.“Morgue.Now.”


End file.
